The Suburban Clone Syndrome – Do You Fear It?

The suburban moms

It’s Friday! What does that mean? It means it is time for me to subject you, my loyal readers, to another installment of my rambling nonsense. Today I am going to talk about my fear of labels and the dread I live with everyday of becoming a suburban clone.

What is a suburban clone, you ask? Simply put a suburban clone is a zombie that walks around dressed in styles that come from the select, handful of shops that the suburban moms shop at. A suburban clone is the woman who sits in Starbucks on a Friday morning with her skinny mocha “chit-chatting” with three other similarly dressed women discussing school politics, last weekend’s soccer game and, in a nutshell, continuously trying to one-up each other with their humble brags.I could go on, but you get the point.

I don’t want to offend anyone. I have friends who LOVE the fact that they are The Suburban Mom. They are proud of their accomplishments, their kids, their husband and the life that they have built. I have those things, too. I have children, a husband, a good life and I live in suburbia (although, it it technically borders on rural). So, why do I fiercely reject labels? Why will I go out of my way to be different from everyone else? I will purposely not purchase an outfit that I actually liked at one of those “mom stores” simply because off the ideological label that unpurposely comes attached to it.

This morning I sat in Starbucks with my regular mocha and reflected on my anti-label attitude. Here is what I came up with. I reject all labels. Not just the mom label. I reject the wife label. The daughter label. The thirty-five year old woman label. The reason I reject these labels is not that I don’t want to be a wife, daughter, mother or thirty-five year old woman because I am clearly all of these things. I think the root of my adversion to labels is the fear of being imperfect.

When I feel labeled, I feel backed into a corner; pigeon-holed into an exact mold with precise instructions on how I am suppose to act as the wife, mother, daughter, etc. I have perfectionist tendencies. To be what others expect of that particular role creates automatic anxiety. So, when I feel cornered into a role I panic; certain I will fail to live up to that expectation. Oh, my God! I forgot sign the permission slip for the field trip. I suck as a mom! Crap, I didn’t send my mom a birthday card. Shitty daughter of the year award belongs to me. I am not even going to mention how many times I have failed in the wife role. So, to avoid these feelings of failure, I rebel. I become the adult version of a rebellious teenage who rejects anything normal just because she can.

Labels always come with expectations. It is just the way the label creators set-up the game. I guess I feel if I am just me no one has any preconcieved ideas of who I am suppose to be. If I forget to sign a permission slip,I am not mom who forgot and failed as mother. I am simply Denise who forgot and there aren’t any expectations to knock me down.

Am I the only person who feels this way? Do you welcome certain roles with open arms or do you run-away from zombie, suburban clones like I do?


About Denise McGrail

I am thrilled and blessed to have the opportunity to be a part of The General Gazette. Like so many women, I put off my dreams of being a professional, published writer for longer than intended in order to meet the more practical needs of my family. However, after much soul-searching, I realized I was doing a disservice to them and me by not following my dreams and my passions.

Why am I excited to be part of The General Gazette? Well, I am a woman who seems to flit and flutter from one thought to the next and I have a million ideas I am always eager to share. The General Gazette is a website intended for women of all ages, all incomes and all lifestyles. We don't limit our audience and, therefore, I will not limit the information I share with you.

Each day I will keep you guessing with fresh, thought-provoking articles! Happy reading!